Last week I spoke to an older lady who asked me point blank about oils to help her husband “in the bedroom.”  Sometimes, people will whisper when they say things that might make others uncomfortable, but she just went for it.  I thought it was wonderful.

This is a topic that comes up in classes and usually people present it in a joking manner:  “There’s an oil for almost everything?  How about increasing libido?”  And then they are fairly shocked when I say, “Yep, that too!”

Our lives today have become busy, stressful, and consumed with electronics.  Our relationships are getting neglected, and that carries over into intimacy areas.

In truth, we all want what my older friend asked for, to spice up our love life!  We might not all talk about it, but it is there!

There are two primary ways essential oils can improve things in the bedroom.

The first is aromatic. We all know smells can impact our emotions and even create a physical reaction.  Think of freshly baked cookies, your favorite aunt’s perfume, or the smell of home.

And if you take a minute, you’ll realize scent plays an important role in the bedroom, too.  Why do you think the perfume business is multi-million dollar enterprise?  Smells can get things moving, so to speak!

Here is a touch of the science: essential oils impact the olfactory nerve which sends messages to the limbic part of the brain.  Because essential oils are made of such complex molecules with therapeutic properties, they can then stimulate the brain into different responses.

They are natural substances that can respond with our body chemistry without chemical concoctions. In this case, we are wanting a … shall we say …  “excited” response.

In the brain, the hypothalamus is directly related to hormone control and it regulates sex drive, energy levels, and production of hormones.  Essential oils will impact the hypothalamus in different ways.

In this case, we are looking for romance, excitement, and enticement!  Aroma can improve sexual desire, arouse the senses, lower inhibitions, and increase energy.


“Let’s Get Closer” Blend

  • Balance (Grounding Blend)
  • Ylang Ylang
  • Sandalwood

“Let’s Get Playful” Blend    Let's Get Playful Diffuser blend

  • Fennel
  • Bergamot
  • Elevation (Joyful Blend)

“Let’s Get Spicy” Blend

  • White Fir
  • Citrus Bliss (Invigorating Blend)
  • Cassia
  • Patchouli


The second way you can incorporate essential oils into the bedroom is topical.  What better way to get a nice massage from your loved one than to tell them it will help spice things up?

Rub away stress and tension while you connect with each other again.  Create your own massage oils or lotions using your favorite “love” oils.

A foot massage is an amazing way to start.  It can be non-threatening if you need to start things off slow, and the reflex points in the feet are connected to the erogenous zones.

  • Massage the arches of the foot using your thumb to stimulate pressure points.
  • Next, the balls and heels of the feet.  Rub each toe gently and pull the oils up the toe and out.
  • You are drawing negative energies up and out of the body.
  • Finally, use your knuckles to deeply massage through the arch.  This should stimulate many areas of the body and fire things up!


Massage oil for her:Bringing Sexy Back Me massge blend

  • Clary Sage
  • Geranium
  • Lavender
  • Sweet Almond Oil

Massage oil for him:

  • Frankincense
  • Sandalwood
  • Lavender
  • Sweet Almond Oil



Sandalwood has an exotic, warm, woodsy aroma, making it perfect for men.  It has been used historically in meditation and can center the mind in a powerful way.  It is also a great tension reliever and calms the body.  Sandalwood creates a feeling of openness and has a scent similar to male pheromones.

Ylang Ylang

Ylang Ylang would be on the opposite spectrum and has a light, flowery aroma that is known to increase sexual energy and enhance relationships.  Ylang Ylang can help you feel closer to others. It is a well known aphrodisiac and helps balance out emotions to put you in a place ready to receive and enjoy.


This is dōTERRA’s specific blend with a soft, warm aroma.  It is designed to create a unique personal fragrance when combined with your personal body chemistry.  Whisper can promote hormone balance and help you feel relaxed and calm. It has a powerful collection of oils including Jasmine and Rose which are frequently mentioned when discussing essential oils for intimacy.  Both of these oils are expensive when they are pure and potent, which makes the Whisper blend a great way to get these benefits.

Clary Sage

We mentioned balancing hormones and your body will respond to Clary Sage in this way.  It also is deeply relaxing, promotes euphoria, and acts a powerful aphrodisiac.  Because of the hormonal impact, this is a fabulous oil to use all month.  We know when mom isn’t stable, nothing fun is going to be happening!


Need to bring some spice to your love life?  Cinnamon is a warm, stimulating oil that can do just that!  If things are … sluggish, add some cinnamon and get the blood flowing!

WARNING!  This is a “hot” oil meaning it will create sensitivity to the skin.  So do not apply to those sensitive spots!  You could diffuse in the bedroom or apply diluted to reflex points on the feet.  Dilute in 1:4 ratio.


This powerful scent can be very seductive and promotes sexual openness.  It can help improve communication on a physical and emotional level and even help us release sexual fears.  There could be a reason the 70’s and the era of “free love” saw an increase in use of patchouli!

Ready to get started with essential oils to address this (and other key areas) of your life?  Email me for a private consult and a free ebook with lots of recipes and tips for using these and other “love oils”!

What’s your favorite way to use essential oils to boost or enhance your intimacy?

Love Blog1

This post was written for our friends at Keeper of the Home. We encourage you to check them out!




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